Meet Stella, My Sister

My sister is getting a new fake name. I’ve been considering it for a while, and when I proposed the idea to her, she liked it.

Here’s why:

• I chose her old name decades ago, back when she was less communicative and too young to understand abstractions like privacy on the internet.
  • So she never got to choose what it was.
• Her old name is a little too similar to her IRL name.
  • As I search for permanent and stable employment, I don’t want employers to find out that I’m autistic and rule me out without giving me a fair chance.
  • My sister is also entering the adult world, and she has the right to determine what gets shared online; a breach of my privacy wouldn’t be good for her either.

In celebration of us approaching adulthood milestones together, I offered her the chance to choose herself a new fake name. She took it.

I drew up a list of potential names that I thought she’d like, while telling her that she could go beyond the list if she liked. I wrote the meanings of each name on the side.

And as soon as she read “Stella (star),” she loved it. Didn’t care about the rest of the list.

My sister has always loved stars. She has a hoodie with a huge glittery star on it. She likes it when people tell her she’s a star or a rock star. She likes space, Star Wars, and Star Trek. And if you see her in person, you’ll notice she can light up a room.

My sister is 100% a Stella.

I asked her if she wanted a middle name too. She glanced at the list and said May. A month in Spring when the weather gets warmer and school comes to an end… I can get why she likes May.

What does this mean for you?

Well, my lovely readers, it’s pretty simple:

• I’ll be doing my best to call my sister Stella from now on.
• You’ll notice that past posts now refer to her as Stella instead of her former fake name.
• Don’t feel bad if you refer to her by her old name.
  • WordPress comments can be edited.
  • If you’d like, you can copy your comment content, delete the comment, paste it into a new one, then change the name and post it.
  • And if you can’t, no big deal. She’s had the old name for almost a decade so it’s not going to be erased from the internet entirely.

I appreciate how lovely and kind everyone has been, respecting my privacy and putting up with my weird secrecy. It’s good people like you who give me hope for a better world, where someday disabilities are not seen as barriers to employment and people can be more open about who they are.

It’s a world I’d like for all of you. And in all of you, I see such amazing potential.

Thank you for listening and caring. Stella and I are glad to have people like you in the world.